maybe sbl can follow malawi’s example and fine people for farting

Malawi No Farting Lawi mean, why should the sbl stop at projector fines? if they’re really looking to raise some money, sbl should consider taking a page out of malawi’s playbook. the african nation is considering passing new “gas laws” that would fine people for breaking wind in public. i guess this means i won’t be visiting lilongwe any time soon.

but seriously, this would be a quick way for sbl to raise a lot of money quickly. think about it: fining sbl conference attendees for cuttin’ cheese is a sure moneymaker. conference attendees are usually on the run, sitting for long periods of time and ‘holding it,’ irregularly eating fried, greasy foods, drinking coffee in between sessions, standing around talking and ‘shifting their weight’, crop dusting each other as they hurriedly pass each other on the way to sessions, breaking wind at the biblical archaeological society booth simply out of spite, and staying up late drinking. and that’s before they get back to the hotel room. quite frankly, i am fearful of my hotel room at the san francisco marriott marquis come this november. what if the malawi police are in there? or worse yet, sbl fine collectors? it could result in citation after citation with the roommates i have. and only heaven knows how many citations would be handed out in the ‘blogging and online publication‘ section. heck, sbl could raise enough money in the blogging section to buy projectors for every conference attendee. they could just put one in every free tote bag you get when you walk in along with the israel travel brochures and continuum/t+t clark ads you immediately throw away.

so come on sbl, take the next logical step and do like the malawis do: fine ’em for flatulence.

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